FAFSA

FAFSA is the most beneficial aspect of college. Young chirrens like myself whose parents aren’t wealthy enough to pay for school out of pocket depend on federal aid to get us through the best four, five, or twenty years of school. Where would we middle class chirrens be without federal funding!?

In any event, usually in January I do my FAFSA. But lately, I’ve been taking the Howard Administration CPT approach. I’ve been doing it in parts, taking my time, setting it aside doing things that are less important, and doing it way when it’s convenient for me. So Saturday I log on to Howard’s website for no apparent reason, boredom clearly, and I see there’s a bulletin posted that FAFSAs are due by February 15^th. Now last time I checked, FAFSA forms are due until mid-June. Why is Howard trying to get slick and rush people into getting their FAFSAs in early when they know full well they won’t have them processed in time for the next school year? Last year, I did my FAFSA literally on January 2, 2009 for the Fall/Spring school year. So Fall comes around, tell me why I didn’t even get my aid dispersed until late October? No sir. Timex would not approve of such a wait.

Being that two of my friends are white collar con-artists by nature, I tried to find a loop hole so that I could file independent and get more money for school. But apparently they’ve already beat me to the punch. Then they tried to get smart with me:

See, if you try to lie, they catch you. The option basically says “Look child, we don’t have time for your foolishness and crime”. So naturally I picked the second option, and it led me to this page:

Now basically FAFSA gives you another chance to come clean. Basically the first option is saying, “Mmhmm, lying tramp, put your parent’s information on the FAFSA. Up there tryna lie”. At this point I had no choice but to put my parent’s information on the form. I was so unhappy because I need to file independent so I can get more money. Perhaps I could marry a foreign woman within the next handful of hours so that I can file independent…and then divorce her. Mrs. FAFSA put me right in my place, and I did not appreciate it.

Money, money, money, money…MONEY! With FAFSA many students are lucky enough to have more than enough money for school and get refund checks. Luckily, I was one of those students [does the tootsie roll]. Unlike many of the Howard students, I didn’t run over to Friendship Heights buying things I couldn’t afford on a normal basis. As always, I took my father’s advice to “take care of your business first, and then have fun”. I went down to the bookstore to buy my books once I got my refund check. I went upstairs to the second level looking for my criminal justice book. When I noticed that the book was $115 I did a

 

Followed by a

And finished it with a

I was not paying $100+ for a book. Then I went over and looked for my French book only for it to not be there as well. At which point, I was already a little uneasy about the events that had just transpired, so I just left. I got online and looked for my books and I found a few of them and ordered them. I’m sure they were much cheaper than the bookstore prices…as if that isn’t a surprise. I also took the time to head over to Ebay and bought some more Janet and Michael posters. So I did some research and learned that the 5th edition of the criminal justice book was word for word the same as the 6th edition and was only $30. In any event, the point of this whole thing is to know how to learn how to work your money to the best of your ability. Take care of what you need to take fare of first, and then have fun. Remember, work then play.

So lately the weather has been confusing DC with another place with all this snow we’ve been getting. A few days before the snow hit, I decided to head over to Safeways [yes that extra “S” is just to piss off certain people] to restock on food. And as always, I go in there getting a whole bunch of stuff I didn’t go in there for. It usually starts off with “ooh these are 2 for $5”. Then it becomes “well it’s only $3 that’s not much”. Finally it becomes “Ooh these are finally on sale, let me get these now”. And by the time I actually get around to what I went into the store, I’m like “oh heck naw, not for no $3.49. They done lost they mind”…followed by looks of disgust and confusion at the price of what I went into the store for. SMH. So it was around 7:30 when I went over to the meat section at the back of the store. After getting my meats, I decided to get in line. Little did I know once I turned around I was already in line. Yes kids, the lines were THAT long. Maybe I came at a bad time. Maybe people had just gotten paid and were shopping. Maybe it was December 24, 2012. Who knows? But get this. I put my basket down, walked from 18^th street to 14^th street to Target to look for something, walked back to the Safeway, only to realize the same people that were in line were STILL in line. And I’m like, what the…? So I just took the L and waited in line endlessly for the self-checkout. Took me quite some time, but I did it. And I’m STILL upset about DC government implementing this new law about charging a nickel for each plastic bag used. Supposedly it’s to clean up the Patomac River. We all know that’s BS. The Patomac has been dirty, and it will forever be dirty.

In the past week and some change, DC has gotten about 4 feet of snow. I remember waking up, looking out the window, and it looked like east Finland. It was just an unnecessary amount of snow. Now I wasn’t complaining when I realize classes had been canceled for the day. In addition to that, classes for me were canceled for an entire week, not to mention not having class the following monday. What more could a person ask for? So naturally my inner child just HAD to go play in the snow. The snow forced us to walk in the middle of the street because walking on the sidewalk was out of the question. So me and my friend walked in the center of Georgia ave for about 5 blocks without a car in sight. Indeed, Georgia Ave was DEAD on a saturday at 8:30 in the evening. I went out with a few friends to a friend of a friend’s place. Along the way, I couldn’t resist stage diving into mounds of snow. Yes kids, I had the time of my life. Don’t judge me. Of course I had to take pictures:

And believe it or not, there’s two cars buried under all that snow in the second picture. I was out around 3 am. I had to walk over 7-11 because I need another two liter of ginger ale, on top of the fact that I wanted an ice cream sandwich. Again, don’t judge me. I can’t stress that enough.

My life at Howard University.

Epic Fail

I’ve been gone doing my own thing for the past couple of months. Been very busy trying to get work done and manage to milk my way through this institution known as Howard University. In any event, to summarize the past couple of months of my experience, I’ll just pick up where I left off.

Howard Homecoming is a celebration of the football team’s continuous losing streak. Only sometimes it is used to give the players a sense of hope after having lost several games throughout the season. It is a time when students use their “emergency loans” to head over to Georgetown and pick up a new outfit. Girls head over to the salon to get a rent-a-weave. The guys find it necessary to purchase clothing far beyond their means of living they knowingly can’t afford on normal salary. I’m not sure who told some of them Avirex and Iceberg was still in style, but clearly this is not Hampton.

So like a typical person trying to get ahead in life, I only attended the free events that were offered during Homecoming week, Yardfest. Now Yardfest is basically an outdoor concert SUPPOSED to be for Howard students, their friends and/or family, and alumni. However the local residents view it as a “Negro Get Away for a Day” program and mosey their way onto campus as if they actually attend the school…and dare you to say something about it. But then again it’s not like campus security does anything ANYWAY [roll eyes]. So I went to the Yardfest which was aptly title “Rhythm Nation” so I was expecting some type of Janet Jackson tribute, and if I didn’t get one, I was going to raise hell and send Janet a letter telling her to sue Howard for copyright infringement. But lo and behold they knew better than to play with me.

Walking around the yard was fun…lots of girls in spandex so I couldn’t really complain. HOWEVER, there are just some people who refuse to comply with the weather.

Take note of how everyone around is dressed. Warm clothing, jackets, jeans, you know the typical apparel for fall. But as stated, some people refuse to conform.

And there must have been a sale on brown boots at Rack Room Shoes or wherever these girls shop for footwear...

Wearing shorts in 40 degree weather? Fail.

Compromising warmth to look cute in an outfit you know you’ll be returning the following Monday? Fail.

Trying to look cute in front of boys who don’t want you? Epic fail.

For everything else, there's success. This is not one of those times.

Epic fail. 

So moving on…I have the same three classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays weekly. So with that said, you know how you learned in middle school that there’s no such thing as a dumb question? Whoever told you that lied. It was two weeks before Thanksgivings day (a Thursday), and I was in class and had to bear witness to this foolishness:

Professor: I know some of you aren’t coming to class on Tuesday because you’re going home for Thanksgiving…but you know you still have to turn in your work.

Student: If we’re not going to be here that Tuesday, can we turn it in next Thursday?

Professor: Yes...you can turn it in this coming Thursday.

Student: No next Thursday…

Epic fail.

On Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays I only have one class. It is conveniently at 8:10 in the morning. So one day I really didn’t feel like going to class, so I planned to show up late so I wouldn’t have to sit through all 50 minutes of the class. So I left my room around 8:20 and got to class around 8:30. Upon my arrival to class I noticed the professor never showed up, and everyone was signing the role and leaving.

Epic fail.

On November 11^th, it was raining, and kind of cold. I got up at 7:30, got dressed, and did the whole nine, and left for class around 8 a.m. As I was walking, I was wondering why there wasn’t anyone on campus. I walked about two blocks before I realized it was a holiday and we didn’t have class.

Epic fail.

Then I tried to play it off like I was going to the Administration Building, only to get there and realize that was closed as well.

Fail...again.

So Thanksgiving finally came around, and my flight was literally on Thanksgiving day. So thinking that it’s the holiday and this is the Washington, DC airport, I figured that it would be very busy. So I decided that I should get there around 8 a.m. to check in and through security…you know just in case it was really busy. I get off the train and notice the airport is pretty much a ghost town. I look at the clock and it was around 8:00 a.m. I was 4 ½ hours early for my flight.

Epic fail.

I got to the airport expecting this. Instead I got this. So after about 3 ½ hours of waiting, I decided to go to the terminal and prepare to board. It was about 45 minutes before takeoff and I was wondering why no one was boarding. I was at the wrong gate.

Epic fail.

So I was at work one day during a Christmas rush helping a customer when I hear a soft “Oh shit!” followed by a loud noise come from the escalator. I walk over and notice an old woman had successfully fallen down the “up” escalator.

Epic fail.

It took me a few minutes to absorb the events that had just transpired. I knew laughing was out of the question. Not because it was an old woman, but because I was perplexed by how a woman had fallen down the escalator going up. Like, isn’t that a conflict of interest? I think I was more in shock than anyone. I assumed her dress had gotten caught in the side somehow. But that’s all assumption. And then when someone had finally gotten her off the escalator, she said she did not need medical attention. Ma’am, you are about six breaths from Judgment Day. You need to see a paramedic. So once I got off work, I was in the back gathering my things to leave and these two co-workers were discussing the incident. And one of them said, “you know that’s why I always hold on to the handrail when I’m on the escalator.” And I was thinking to myself, it’s not that serious. Just get on the escalator and stand still until you get to the top!

Epic fail.

To this day I am still dumbfounded on how that old woman managed to pull that off.

My life at Howard University.

Classroom Etiquette

There’s a class, I won’t, say the name of it, but this class reaffirms my position that Howard has some of the dumbest kids the US has to offer. You’d think after many years of being in school, you would have a grasp on classroom etiquette. However, these fools refuse to give in. So I just want to break down some of the rules of proper classroom etiquette and mannerisms.

1.    1. It’s nearly the end of the semester. You’ve been going to class for at least 2 and a half months. Why in the HELL is your phone still going on off in class? Why are you still forgetting to put your phone on vibrate when you enter class? Is it really that hard?

2.  Ladies, nappy horse hair weaves are not conducive to the learning environment. In fact, studies indicate that students are distracted by your nappy locks. There is no reason why your hair looks like a wet mop. If you’re having a bad hair day, wear a hat or some type of head scarf.

3.    3. Coming to class, signing the roll, and leaving minutes later does not constitute as ‘being in class’.

4.    4. Speaking of the roll, unless you’re sitting in the front or back of the row, pass the sign in sheet to the person IN FRONT of you. Not the person to your left. Not the person to your right. Not to the person in the Financial Aid office. To the person IN FRONT of you. It’s not that hard.

5.    5. When you see the roll coming around, have a working pen/pencil ready to sign the roll. Don’t get the roll and spend 10 minutes looking for a pen. You saw the sign in sheet coming.

6.    6. If you come late, do not come to class all loud; dragging the desk in front of class, cutting off the professor, letting the dorm slam. Just tacky. If you’re going be late, please be as quiet as possible when entering.

7.    7. Do not sit in the front and fall asleep. It makes you look like an idiot in front of the professor.

8.    8. How are you gonna come late and then fall asleep in class?

9.    9. If you’re going to be more than 30 minutes late for class, just don’t come; unless it’s Tuesday or Thursday. Freshman year this fool walked in to class at 9:58.

10. 10. Professors with sloppy handwriting is very irritating. It is not a sign of intelligence. I don’t care what people say.

11. 11. Professors with thick accent, you know damn well can’t nobody understand a word you are saying. Write what you’re saying on the board. It’ll save a lot of time.

12. 12. Professors, when half the class is sleep or doing other things, just dismiss class. You’re boring, and wasting people’s time.

13.  13. Please refrain from asking dumb questions in class. I will never forget the fall of 2008. After a quiz, the professor told everyone to pass up their quizzes. Ten minutes later some girl asks, “did you collect the quizzes?”

14. 14. If you’re in an auditorium classroom, don’t come in late expecting there to be seats in the front.

15. 15. How are you gonna come late, and then leave early? WTF was the point in you coming to class?

16. 16. Always agree with the consensus. If the class says push the test back to next week. Agree. Don’t say let’s have it now. You’ll end up on the back of a milk carton.

17.  17. Not coming to class because you didn’t do the assignment doesn’t give you an extension on the assignment. It’s still late whenever you turn it in.

18. 18. Please be aware of what you wearing when you come to class. A gentleman wearing a sleeveless bubble coat and a “Gucci” sun visor caused a massive disturbance in class one day.

That also includes stuff like this:

And this:

19. 19. Don’t be triflin’. Clean up the four course meal you had once class is over.

20. 20. Last, but not least, try your best not to be loud and wrong. I cannot stress that enough. I will laugh uncontrollably.   

My life at Howard University.

When Will You People Learn?

Howard has to have some of the most socially illiterate people I have ever come across. The past two days have been....well I can't put it to words, so I'll just use emoticons. The past two days have been like this , this , and this .


So Tuesday morning, I usually wake up a little after 10, usually 10:15, no later than 10:30 since I have class at 11. So I wake up to the workers doing construction.. So the sun is up and it's sunny. So you know I'm thinking it's about 10, 10:15. I look at my phone. It's 7:42. WTF??? Who in the hell commissioned DC construction workers to begin working so early!? And they weren't doing anything average like fixing a broken sewer pipe. With the noise they were making, you'd think they were erecting a skyscraper. I look out my window to see this:

Pounding the pavement and drilling holes in the ground. Like seriously??? Really??? It didn't cross their minds that people would be, oh I don't know, sleep??? What you're doing at 7:42, I'm sure you can do at 10 or 11. And the vibrations were ricocheting all throughout my room. My bed was like moving like one of those vibrating beds at a run down Vegas motel. They were relatively loud. I couldn't even watch my Step By Step in peace. I was highly disturbed.

But whatever.



Anyway, there are just some things I will never understand. One of them involves common etiquette. So sometime last week I walked over to Safeway. Yes, I walked. You may say from the Towers to Safeway in Adams Morgan is a long walk but it's really not, at least imo. So like usual, I walked in and totally forgot what  I went to the store to get, and ended up buying a whole bunch of stuff I didn't go into the store for. [eats another pack of Gushers]. I didn't feel like walking back to the Towers, so I caught the shuttle at Meridian back to the Towers. So this dummy tries to get on as me and this girl were getting off. Like sir...WTF are you doing??? Did you not think there would be people getting off? You're supposed to look through the window and see if anyone is getting off before you proceed to board the shuttle. You idiot.

It's the same situation with the elevators. First of all, let me just say that pressing the elevator button multiple times isn't gonna make the elevator come any faster. So just stop. It irritates me. Anyway, let people get off the elevators before you try to pile drive your ass onto the elevator. The elevator isn't going anywhere anytime soon. And I'm sure someone will hold the elevator door open so you can get on. It's not that serious.


Whilst walking to class, understand that the sidewalk is built for two way traffic. That entails a person or persons traveling in opposing directions in single file on a walkway. That means one person on one side of the pavement, and another on the other side of the pavement. With that said, if you're walking with a friend or friends in the same direction and there is a person walking towards you, one of you needs to move over. Don't try and get by because you're gonna bump into the person. Let's use common courtesy people. This irritates me. You see me coming. You see there isn't enough room for me to walk by. Move your sloppy ass in front or behind your friend until I pass by. Flipping idiot.





My life at Howard University.

So You Suspended My Visitation...

So about a week or so ago my friend came down from Philly (unannounced). I was happy because I haven't seen the tramp in over a year, despite the fact that she lives 2 hours away. But we wont get in to that. Anyway, so I check her in and whatever. So I call my other ace boon coon and tell him the third person of the "Awesome Threesome" is in town. Of course we wanted it to be a surprise so we didn't tell him. I figured out a way to get him from where he was, back to campus. Wasn't hard, I just told him someone was wearing his clothes. Now how the he got from upper Maryland to DC is 20 minutes is beyond me. So we chit chat in the lobby of the west towers for a bit. So we tell him to try and make it back by 2 am since he lives in the east towers and has 24 hour visitation. So as predicted, he didn't make it back. So 2 am comes, my friend is sleep, I'm on my computer minding mine, and someone knocks at the door. I know who it is and what they wanted, but I didn't feel like getting up. So my friend stayed overnight, even though she wasn't supposed to. So the next day me and my two friends (the SOB that didn't make it back to campus by 2) go to lunch brunch. We have our fun and what not.

So about 3 days later, I get this letter from my RA, or SA, or whatever the hell they're called from the building manager saying my visitation has been suspended due to "improper check out" or whatever the foolishness was. Here's what the letter reads:

"It was brought to  my attention that you violated your visitation privileges. In order to get this privilege restored, you are to provide Community Service.

Located within walking distance of Howard University is Cardozo High School. Through the Howard University Center for Urban Progress a need for volunteer tutors and homework helpers are needed.

You are to provide 20 hours of Community Service, at Cardozo High School, a background clearance my [somehow the building manager misspelled "may"]  be required to work in the District of Columbia School System. 

To schedule available time please contact: so and so

Once the hours are completed, visitation will be restored. If they are not complete visitation privileges is terminated until February 28, 2010."

 [end of letter]




Are they serious???


First of all, is this Howard University of La Petite Academy? Because the lines of distinction are wearing thin. I was baffled as I was reading this "notice". And I'm in my room reading this letter like this, and wondering if they are just pulling my leg. Low and behold, they were dead serious.

Okay, now I'm all for helping the youth. That's all fine and dandy. HOWEVER, this school..no ma'am Pam. First off, the school looks like a replica of a 19th century Soviet Union prison. I think the aesthetics are the least of my worries at this point. This is the same school that went through this just recently. It is a shame that a college student has to fear for their safety at a high school.

And then THE NERVE Howard to insult me by saying, "a background clearance my be required to work in the District of Columbia School System." Excuse me??? I live in a dorm, not a halfway house. And 20 hours at that? I don't even have 20 hours worth of class per week. WTF makes you think I'm gonna spend my time at a high school tutoring Bebe's Kids? Now in the event I do decide to help out the kids, what exactly will I be doing? I know myself, if me and the students hit a snag on something, I'm gonna tell them to just cheat on the test. Yeah it's wrong, but half the nonsense I learned in high school I barely remember, or don't use now. It is really all busy work. I wouldn't be the best candidate for tutoring kids.


Long story short, this letter will find a home somewhere in the DC landfill, wherever that may be. I will have visitors whether if they know about it or not. I pay to be here. Don't restrict my rights.




My life at Howard University.